There and Back Again
by Jezrana
Summary: Trapped in the Land of the Dead while he himself is still alive, one man struggles to find a way back to those he loves. Yes, this is a denial!fic about the "death" in OotP. No, you should not read it if you don't want the book spoiled.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: JKR owns Sirius, Remus, Harry, etc. I just kidnap them...er, invite them over to play once in a while.  
  
I own Alexandra and Celina, who are from my fic Remembrance. If you don't like OCs in general, or, heaven forbid, don't like these two for some reason...you probably won't like this story. Tough.  
  
A.N: Okay. So. A character in a book about *magic* gets hit with a curse that, while not specified in nature, is definitely *not* Aveda Kedavra, and subsequently falls backwards through a mysterious veil in the Department of Big Crazy Magical Secret Things, and promptly vanishes.  
  
...Since when is a situation like that a death scene? *walks off, shaking her head in bewilderment*  
  
There And Back Again  
  
Prologue  
  
His fall knocked the breath from him, and he was still in pain from taking the full blast of Bellatrix Lestrange's curse, so it was several moments before he could move or speak. Recovering somewhat, he rubbed his aching chest with his hand and growled, "I owe you for that one, Bella..."  
  
Sitting up, he opened his eyes, then blinked, squeezed them shut for a moment, and tried again. Why the hell couldn't he see anything? But wait- something was coming visible in front of him. A stone archway, with an old ragged-looking curtain hanging from it. That was the archway he'd fallen through! And beyond it, he could hear Harry calling his name, though his voice sounded strangely distant, as if he were calling from miles away.  
  
"Harry-" Sirius called in response, rising and stepping toward the curtain with his hand outstretched. "It's okay, I'm alri-" he stopped short as his hand met the curtain and tried to push it back. It didn't move. It was as if it was carved out of stone, but he could feel the softness of the fabric beneath his fingers, he just couldn't move it. He pushed at it harder, and then again with all his strength. Nothing. On the other side of the archway, he could hear Remus now. "There's nothing you can do, Harry...he's gone..."  
  
"No!" he shouted. Couldn't they hear him calling? And why was it so hard for him to hear them? "Remus, Harry, I-I'm alright, I just-can't get back through the curtain!" He pounded his fist against the fabric; it didn't so much as budge.  
  
"They can't hear you, you know." said a querulous voice behind him. "And you may as well stop banging on the Veil, because you can't get through it- not that way."  
  
Sirius spun around. His surroundings were still in almost total gloom, making it hard to see anything, but one clearly defined figure stood in front of him. A tall, elderly wizard with a long gray beard, wearing silver robes and surveying Sirius like a disapproving teacher.  
  
"Who're you?" Sirius asked, looking him up and down.  
  
"Who am I?" The old wizard said, looking faintly shocked. "Such impertentince! You fall through my Veil, make all this racket, and then want to know who I am? The question is, young man, who are you?"  
  
Sirius might have found this old man amusing, if he hadn't been so confused and so eager to get back through the Veil. "Sirius Black. Now, if it's not too much trouble, would you mind telling me who you are, where I am, because it definitely looks like I'm not in the Ministry anymore, and, most importantly, how I get back?"  
  
"One thing at a time, young man! One thing at a time." The wizard made a sweeping bow. "I am-do you know, I don't believe I can remember what my name was when I was in the Land of the Living? Shame...oh well...around here, anyway, they've always called me Morpheus."  
  
"Right. And, like I said-where is 'here'?"  
  
"Why, the Land of the Dead, of course! I would think that, having fallen through the Veil in the Death Chamber, you would realize-"  
  
"Land of the Dead?!"  
  
"Oh, don't worry-Sirius, did you say? You're quite alive. I must say this is very exciting-it's been centuries since I built that Archway, and you're the first actually living person to come through here...well, besides myself, of course."  
  
Alright, so he wasn't dead, at least...that was comforting. "So that archway is a portal to the Land of the Dead, and my falling through it sent me here even though I'm still alive?"  
  
"Exactly, dear boy. It's quite a simple concept, really."  
  
"So why can't I just go back through?"  
  
"Because this is the entrance Archway! You see-wait, let me make sure I can remember all this before I start...ah, yes. You see, Sirius, in the Land of the Dead there are two Archways, each corresponding to a different side of the Archway in the Death Chamber. You enter the Veil there, you come out here, at the entrance Archway. To get back, you have to find the exit Archway in here, which will put you back out on the other side of the Veil in the Death Chamber."  
  
"Alright...well, that doesn't sound too difficult." Bending down, Sirius grabbed his wand from where it had fallen beside him. "Where's the exit Archway?"  
  
Morpheus opened his mouth, paused suddenly, and closed his mouth. "I...err...can't remember..." he said sheepishly.  
  
Sirius sighed. "Great, just great..."  
  
"I...err...I think it was over that way..." Morpheus said feebly, pointing to the left.  
  
"Guess I'm heading that way, then...I don't suppose there's anything else you can help me with?" There was a slight note of sarcasm in his voice, but the elderly wizard didn't seem to catch it.  
  
"Not I...but I have no doubt you will be helped in this journey, Sirius Black."  
  
Sirius paused, having been about to set out. "What makes you say that?"  
  
Morpheus flashed a slight grin at him. "I've just remembered why your name sounded familiar...you have many friends in this realm, do you not, Sirius Black?" Sirius's stomach flip-flopped at the sudden thought that he might see James and Lily here. The old man continued. "Of course, I don't know where any of them are...but I'm sure that, once they catch wind that you are here, alive, they will do all they can to help you return to the Land of the Living."  
  
Sirius nodded. "Thanks." Looking into the darkness ahead of him, he muttered "Lumos." And held his wand in front of him like a torch.  
  
"Good luck, Sirius Black!" Morpheus called as he walked away. Already, his voice was beginning to sound distant, as Harry's and Remus's had. "And remember!"  
  
"Remember what?" Sirius called absently over his shoulder. Getting no answer, he turned. "Remember what? Morpheus?"  
  
But the old wizard was gone.  
  
A.N: This would be where I put the usual stay tuned for the next chapter bit...but the next chapter is already written, and I would be an evil author and wait until this got some reviews to put the next bit up, but I'm too eager to share it, so...yeah... 


	2. Chapter One

A.N: I wonder if this counts as my fastest update ever, or if it just doesn't count as an update at all, as it's being put up about five minutes from the first part...  
  
Chapter One  
  
Oh God  
  
If you're out there won't you hear me?  
  
I know that we've never talked before  
  
Oh God  
  
The man I love is leaving  
  
Won't you take him when he comes to your door?  
  
Am I in Heaven here or am I in Hell?  
  
At the crossroads I am standing  
  
So now you're sleeping peaceful  
  
I lie awake and pray  
  
That you'll be strong tomorrow  
  
And we'll see another day and we will praise it  
  
I love the light that brings a smile  
  
Across your face  
  
*****  
  
Remus Lupin stirred, wondered vaguely why his arm felt so numb, then opened his eyes and remembered. Remembered...everything.  
  
Alexandra was still fast asleep. He wanted to slip his arm out from under her, but he couldn't stand the thought of waking her right now. Let her stay at peace for as long as she can, he told himself.  
  
He felt someone touch his free hand and glanced up. Celina was awake on the other side of Alexandra, staring up at the ceiling, her green eyes dark with a tangle of different emotions. She said nothing, and neither did Remus. He simply squeezed her hand, and she squeezed back, a ghost of a smile flitting across her pale face.  
  
Such calm and quiet now, in the aftermath of their shared grief. Had it only been a few hours ago that Alexandra had been falling apart in their arms, one fist striking Remus's chest and shoulder again and again with a futile, desperate need to strike out at something, even if it was him? Had it only been the night before that all three of them, even Celina, had wept and screamed and whispered Sirius's name, as if invoking him could somehow bring him back? Had so little time passed since he'd brought them the news, wanting with all his heart not to but knowing they needed to hear it from him?  
  
He'd picked Ally up and carried her into her bedroom after she'd finally collapsed against him, exhausted from grieving. He'd set her down on the bed and started to leave, but she'd held onto him, and finally he'd lain down beside her. Cel had slipped onto the bed on her sister's other side, holding her with uncharacteristic tightness, and Remus had wrapped his arms around both of them. After Ally cried herself to sleep, he and Cel and stayed awake for a while, their hands and foreheads brushing as they held her between them, their eyes communicating what they had no words for. Finally, they'd drifted off as well, and they'd lain curled up in the bed like three children.  
  
Remus glanced over at Cel. Her grief had not been as all-consuming as his or Ally's, he knew. Sirius had not been as close or meant as much to her as to either of them, and that was reflected in her calm expression now. She had mourned him as much as she had found it in her to mourn him, and he knew she was ready to move on now, as he and Ally would not be able to do for a much longer time.  
  
"You'll have to be the strong one now." He whispered, his voice barely disrupting the silence. "You'll have to help us carry on until we can do it on our own."  
  
She looked at him for the first time, smiling ruefully. "Rem, if I have to be the strong one, we're screwed. You know that, right?"  
  
He managed to smile back at her, even as tears ran down his cheeks. "Yeah...I know."  
  
He wanted to tell her that she was wrong, that she had so much more strength than she gave herself credit for. But you didn't tell Celina things like that. You just waited for her to realize it on her own.  
  
She leaned across Alexandra and kissed him, not saying anything else. There was nothing more to say.  
  
*****  
  
As Sirius walked, he began to be able to make out his surroundings, although everything seemed dim, hazy, and slightly distorted, like a dream where you couldn't focus on anything too carefully or it would dissolve. From what he could make out, he seemed to be walking through a vast, dark forest. There was no real color anywhere-the ground, the trees, and what he could make out of the sky all ranged from black to gray to a kind of dull silver-and the only source of light was his own wand.  
  
It reminded him vaguely of Dante's Inferno. He'd never really read it-Ally and Remus both had, and they'd told him the story. It had been interesting, and he'd started to read it for himself, but quickly discovered that medieval Italian poetry was not his style. But, anyway, he remembered that Dante's journey had started in a strange, sinister wood. And, as he considered it, the parallel gave him hope. Dante had journeyed through Hell and Purgatory and, in the end, reached Paradise. Would Sirius successfully make his way through the Land of the Dead to rejoin the Living?  
  
The longer he journeyed, the harder it was to maintain that hope. At first, he'd felt full of energy, hurrying forward and expecting the second Arch to loom ahead of him any second. But the forest seemed to stretch ahead endlessly, and now when he looked back it stretched behind him endlessly, too. No sign of the Arch he'd come through. He began to feel sluggish and slightly disoriented, again as though he were walking through a dream. Struggling against a gnawing, growing sensation of hopelessness, he thought back on Morpheus' hint that he would most likely receive help in the Land of the Dead.  
  
"James..." he said softly, his own voice in the silence both startling and comforting. "Prongs, if you're out there, if you can help me, I need you. Lily...find me. Help me. Please..."  
  
He thought of all the others he and his loved ones had lost t this colorless, hazy world. Alexandra's father, and her brother and his wife...his own Uncle Alphard...James's parents...and so many from the Order...Marlene, Benjy, the Prewett brothers...  
  
He paused, realizing something. He couldn't remember what the Prewetts' first names had been. For that matter, what had Marlene and Benjy's last names been? Bloody Hell, what had Ally's father's name been?! Feeling panic rise within him, he remembered the last thing Morpheus had said.  
  
"Good luck, Sirius Black-and remember!"  
  
At the same time, he remembered how scatterbrained and forgetful the old man had seemed. The pieces clicked in his dream-fogged mind.  
  
Oh. Bloody. Hell.  
  
He stopped where he was and pressed his hands to his temples, wracking his brains until Nicodemus Merlin's name came clear in his mind. And Ally's brother, he had been Nicodemus as well, but they called him Nick. And the Prewetts had been Gideon and Fabian, that was it. He kept at it until he could remember all the names that had ever been important enough for him to remember in the first place. Then, he moved on, wondering how soon he'd have to do this again.  
  
*****  
  
A.N: *blinks* Why am I in such a good mood now when I'm putting poor sweet Remus and Ally and Cel through so much unadulterated ANGST?  
  
Anyway, Harry should come into this soon, which will be the first time Harry is actually a character in something I write and not just getting mentioned. Yaaaaay!  
  
And there shall be James and Lily ghostiness as well. Yaaaay! (Well, not yay for them being ghosts, but...you know...) Edit: And silly forgetful me, the song lyrics belong very much to Sarah MacLachlan, not myself. 


	3. Chapter Two

A.N: Update! Completion of chapter! Yay!  
  
Thanks for the feedback so far. And, let's see...  
  
Someone suggested I put in more information about Ally and Cel, their backgrounds, etc. You get that in this chapter, and more in the next one, but their whole story is told in my fic "Remembrance". Or at least, it will be if I a) ever finish it and b) finish the touch-ups and rewrites it is currently in need of.  
  
Oh, and apparently, I am "some kinda retard for thinking I have obtained spoilers to the sixth book". Thank you for playing, but no. When I said in the summary not to read this if you don't want "the book" spoiled, I assumed people would know, through the use of a thing called common sense, that I was talking about the FIFTH book. Silly me.  
  
But anyway...the first half of this chapter is the same, and after the little asterik-break-thingy, there's the newly added second half.  
  
Chapter Two  
  
He had no conception of how long he'd been in the forest. He couldn't even be sure he was heading in the same direction anymore-thick, silvery mists had enveloped his path more than once, and with the effect this place was having on his mind, he might easily have gotten turned around without realizing it.  
  
Finally he let himself slump to the ground, burying his face in his hands like a lost, frightened child. There was no denying the facts of his situation-he had no idea where he was, had never been sure of where he was going, and he was slowly but surely losing his memory. He'd been testing himself periodically, and quickly realized he was fighting a losing battle. The names of casual acquaintances, a few dates of varying importance, and some memories of his days at Hogwarts were lost to him now. Damn it, if he had to forget, there were memories he would gladly have offered up. By what cruel irony were his years in Azkaban still vivid in his mind, while he couldn't remember the music they had played at James's wedding?  
  
How long would it be before he forgot his loved ones entirely? How long before he completely forgot Remus, or Harry, or even Alexandra? And once he no longer remembered them, once he lost his desperation to get back to them, would he be content to stay in this place forever?  
  
He'd never been one to accept defeat, even when defeat seemed inevitable. He'd escaped from Azkaban, hadn't he? Was some stupid ruddy forest going to defeat Sirius Black, even if it was a stupid ruddy forest in the Land of the Goddamned Dead?  
  
But this was different...in Azkaban, horrible as it had been, he'd known where he was and who he was. He'd been tormented with memories he desperately wanted to forget, but at least he'd had his memories. And when he'd escaped, he'd known where he was going and how he was going to get there. Now, he was just so...lost. Huddled on the forest floor, shaking with suppressed sobs, he tried to gather the strength to rise and keep walking.  
  
"Padfoot?"  
  
It sounded like an echo from another room, so softly it took a moment before Sirius was sure he'd heard it. Not daring to let hope rise within him just yet, he stood and turned.  
  
The figure standing behind him was as colorless and hazy as everything in this dream-world, but it was undeniably James. From the short, messy black hair to the scuffed sneakers he'd always worn unless he absolutely had to wear nice shoes for some reason, looking exactly as he had on the night of October 30, 1981, when Sirius left Godric's Hollow never dreaming he would never see his best friend alive again-it was James.  
  
Sirius was running towards him before the thought that they might not be able to touch had time to occur to him. Such a worry would have proved unnecessary as his arms closed around James, who returned the hug with equal force. Sirius lost control of his tears then, crying unashamedly into James's shoulder as the two tried to make up for fourteen years of separation with a single embrace.  
  
Finally Sirius pulled back, letting his hand's rest on the other's shoulders. "God, Prongs, it's good to see you again."  
  
A smile that was faintly tinged with sadness crossed James's face. "I would've preferred not to have this reunion for a good long time yet, but as long as you're here, mate, it's good to see you too."  
  
"Where's Lily?"  
  
"Right here." She glided out of the shadows behind her husband, where she'd waited to let him meet Sirius first. He'd been half hoping she would somehow still have her red hair and brilliant green eyes, Sirius reflected briefly as they embraced, but she too looked like a black-and-white film version of herself, softened around the edges with time.  
  
"Leave it to you to show up alive in the Land of the Dead." she said as she stepped back from him, keeping hold of one of his hands and slipping her other hand into James's. "How's your memory coming along?"  
  
"You know about that?" Sirius asked, faintly surprised.  
  
She nodded. "I know Morpheus. He periodically forgets everything he's ever known. Fortunately, when he remembers, he's in the habit of telling his story over and over to anyone who'll listen, so when he forgets we just tell it back to him."  
  
A spark of hope flared in Sirius's mind. "Then do you know where the other Arch is?"  
  
"No...I'm sorry. Morpheus forgot that, along with his real name, before he ever told anyone. That's why he's still here."  
  
"We may still have a chance of finding it, though." James interjected.  
  
"How?"  
  
"Well, supposedly, when you finally get through this forest, there's this mountain, and supposedly there's this observatory at the top of the mountain that you can see the entire Land of the Dead from."  
  
"You can't see the entire Land of the Dead." Lily objected. "It's too vast. But you can see a lot. Even if we can't find the Arch from there, the one who built the observatory may be able to help us."  
  
Sirius smiles for the first time since he'd fallen through the Veil. "Let's go then. And...do you guys mind filling me in on some memories while we walk?"  
  
"Oh, sure!" James said enthusiastically as they set out. "See, to start with, your name is Sirius Black, and I'm James Potter, and we're both wizards, and you've always been pretty good looking but not nearly as devastatingly handsome as me-"  
  
"Don't think I won't smack you just because you're already dead, Prongs..."  
  
*****  
  
"You're sure you want to do this?" Remus asked one more time.  
  
"I'm sure." She replied with a resolute nod. "I should have done this a long time ago. Nothing's going to stop me from doing it now."  
  
He, Alexandra, and Celina stood outside the front door of Number Four, Privet Drive, looking more like they were going into battle than calling on old acquaintances. The Merlins had known Petunia briefly and only met Vernon Dursley once or twice, but that was more than enough. As for Remus, he remembered their brief meeting at King's Cross, not even two weeks ago. Ally's meeting with Harry would probably be difficult enough, but before they even got to that point, they were going to have to run the gauntlet of the Muggles.  
  
Remus had suggested they all wear Muggle clothes, which might at least decrease the chances that Vernon would slam the door in their faces, but, glancing at Celina and himself, it occurred to Remus that he might just do that anyway. Cel wore Muggle clothes most of the time anyway, but a midriff- baring Rocky Horror Picture Show t-shirt, tight black jeans, and her customary thick-heeled boots weren't likely to make a favorable impression on Harry's conservative relatives. His own attire was more orthodox-a linen shirt, trousers, and oxford shoes-but being worn, scuffed, and patched in places, it probably wouldn't meet with approval either. Ally, in a loose peasant blouse and linen skirt, was their best bet for a spokesperson, so he gestured to her to step forward and ring the doorbell.  
  
When the door opened, Vernon greeted her with an abrupt "Yes?", obviously wondering what business this strange woman had with him. Not surprising that he didn't recognize her. Before Ally could answer, his eyes had first widened as he saw Celina, then narrowed as he saw Remus, definitely recognizing him. Before he could do something like slam the door on them, Ally took a deep breath and stepped into the open doorway.  
  
"We'd like to speak to Harry, if you don't mind. Is he home?" "Are you-the two of you-*his kind* as well?" Vernon's tone clearly indicated he *did* mind.  
  
Ally paused for a moment, fighting down a surge of anger. Harry should never have had to live with these people, and she knew she was to blame, at least in part, for the fact that he had.  
  
"If you mean wizards, yes, we are. Now if you'll just-"  
  
Vernon literally winced at hearing the word "wizard". He stepped forward, looming over her. You silly fool, she thought briefly. You really think you can intimidate me?  
  
"I'll have you know, madam, that I do not appreciate mention of that boy's- abnormality-in my house, and-"  
  
"Fine, then." Ally couldn't keep herself from snapping at him, just a bit. "If you'll simply be good enough to call Harry, we'll be more than happy to take our conversation with him elsewhere." It was she who stepped forward now, her hand slipping into the pocket where her wand was held. "We would hate to intrude on your *hospitality*."  
  
He seemed to take the hint, stepping back slightly, then turned to bellow up the stairs, only to realize that Harry was already standing at the top of them.  
  
Ally's eyes followed Vernon's upward, and Remus heard her breath catch slightly in her throat, saw Cel's eyebrows lift slightly, as they both took in the always-touching combination of James's looks and Lily's eyes. Neither of them had seen Harry since he was a baby. As for Remus, it was still a bit of a shock how much *older* Harry looked now in comparison to Remus's year teaching at Hogwarts. He was taller now, yes, but more than that it was something in his eyes-something that had first settled there with Cedric Diggory's death, and been further ground into him with every tragedy since, leading up to the awful blow of losing Sirius.  
  
His eyes are too old. Remus remembered thinking the same thing about an eleven-year-old Celina, and about his own adolescent reflection whenever he had looked in a mirror. Too damn old. I'm so tired of seeing children with the eyes of adults.  
  
Harry had heard Uncle Vernon speaking brusquely to someone and come to the top of the stairs out of curiosity, watching as this strange woman had faced his flustered uncle down. He'd studied her, with her wavy brown hair, dark blue eyes, and features that would have been so much prettier if not for the faint lines on her forehead, the dark circles under her eyes. There seemed something oddly familiar about her, but he didn't think they'd ever met. Then there was the woman behind her, looking alike enough to be her sister, but with stick-straight black hair, emerald eyes, and cheekbones that looked like you could cut yourself on them. Something about her made him feel vaguely uneasy, but at the same time she seemed even more familiar than the other. And beside the second woman was Remus Lupin, who Harry hadn't expected to see again so soon.  
  
He came down the stairs, still glancing at them curiously, then looking to Lupin as if for an explanation. His former teacher stepped forward to shake his hand.  
  
"Hello, Harry. Sorry to just drop in on you like this."  
  
"It's fine, I just-wasn't expecting to see anyone so soon." Harry's brow furrowed as a thought occurred to him. "Has something happened?"  
  
Knowing he meant something involving Voldemort, Lupin shook his head. "No- in fact, things have been unnervingly quiet." Turning slightly, he gestured to the two women. "Harry, this is Alexandra and Celina Merlin."  
  
"Merlin?"  
  
Alexandra nodded and spoke to him for the first time, her voice lower and softer than it had been during her exchange with Uncle Vernon. "I think you know our niece Isadora from school-"  
  
"Kids?" Celina cut in, her voice as smooth and sharp as her appearance. "Maybe we should take this outside?" She punctuated the suggestion with a pointed glance over Harry's shoulder, to where his uncle still stood.  
  
Vernon had been silent since Harry came down the stairs, his face dark with anger at both the nerve of these-*people* to just walk into his house and the nerve of Harry to just start a conversation with them as if this were perfectly *normal*. His eyes settled on his nephew and narrowed.  
  
"*You*." He muttered furiously. "How many times do we have to tell you-"  
  
"You don't want any connection with wizards or magic, and of *course*, if the neighbors see me talking to these three people in the house or out on the doorstep, they'll instantly make the connection that all of us are wizards. Right." Harry wasn't in any mood to deal with his uncle, or inflict him on others. "So, if you don't mind, we'll just be going. Bye!"  
  
Before Vernon could say or do anything else, Harry, Lupin, and the Merlin sisters were out the door and down the front walk. As the door slammed behind them, Celina Merlin caught Harry's eye and grinned.  
  
"Nicely done. Bloody hell, that man gives all Mugglekind a bad name."  
  
Alexandra looked a bit concerned. "You won't get in trouble over this, will you?"  
  
Harry shook his head. "They'll probably just ignore my existence as much as they can for a few days. They haven't done much more than that this summer- they don't even yell at me as much as they used to." He glanced gratefully toward Lupin, who was partially responsible for the Dursley's changed behavior.  
  
Lupin acknowledged the grateful look with a nod and a slight smile, then looked around at the normal, peaceful looking atmosphere of Privet Drive. "Is there anywhere nearby we can go to sit and talk?"  
  
They walked to the park, finding two benches facing across from each other to sit on. Glancing at the two women while they walked, Harry could see their resemblance to Isadora Merlin. That might explain why they seemed familiar, but then, Celina still seemed more familiar to him than Alexandra, while Alexandra's resemblance to their niece was stronger.  
  
Isadora-known to most of Hogwarts as Izzie-was a year above him and a Chaser on the Ravenclaw Quidditch team. Harry had known her through Quidditch, her friendship with Fred and George Weasley, and the fact that her lineage made her almost as well-known as his scar made him. She and Harry had never spoken much, being in different years and different houses, but when they did, they'd always gotten along well. He knew that she, like him, was an orphan, and that she had been raised by her two aunts. Well, that was all well and good, but why were those two aunts here, wanting to speak to him? And how did they know Lupin?  
  
As Alexandra seated herself on the bench across from him, she took a deep breath, staring down at her clasped hands for a moment. "I'm sure you're wondering why we're here." She said in her soft voice.  
  
Harry nodded. She sighed slightly and looked up at him.  
  
"You and I should have had this conversation a long, long time ago, Harry. I really have no excuse for going so long without meeting you, and I'll understand if you feel betrayed by the fact that I did so, but-" She broke off, looking down again. Lupin, who was sitting next to Harry, leaned across the gap between them and touched her hand.  
  
"Ally, I know this is hard for you-"  
  
"I'm alright, Remus." She clasped his hand, reassuringly, then looked back to Harry. "Like I said, you should have known what I'm about to tell you long ago. And Sirius-now that Sirius is...gone, I've realized I can't put it off any further."  
  
The mention of Sirius struck Harry, as did her seeming inability to refer to him as dead. What had his godfather been to this woman? What had she been to him? Her next words answered both those questions.  
  
"I was Sirius's fiancé, Harry. We...we were engaged before your parents died, and we were going to marry, finally, once his name was cleared." As Harry's head jerked up in shock, her dark blue eyes locked onto his. "I'm also your godmother."  
  
A.N: The elusive Izzie, who's been mentioned several times in Remembrance, will finally be making an appearance soon, but I'm not sure how big a role she'll play...a lot of my ideas involving the Merlins and they're interactions with other characters went out the window with OotP. *shrugs*  
  
Anyway, the next chapter will be forthcoming as soon as I do not fail my Philosophy midterm. 


End file.
